tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56997908827080563662024-03-13T23:54:52.968-06:00The Sassy OneHillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.comBlogger773125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-56750777763762374602017-02-03T09:48:00.001-07:002017-02-03T10:27:19.318-07:00recent bits of us<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>Dear Naptime Diary,</i></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>I'm sorry for the way I have absolutely allowed you to disappear into the depths of time with nary a thought of the laundry I should be doing.</i></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;">-Me</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>PS: I'm also sorry (and not sorry at all) for the Thin Mint disappearing act.</i></span></b></div>
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Earlier this week, I stumbled upon a list of unfortunately appealing kindle books that were on sale. I only mention unfortunate so it seems that I am sorry, because my list of to be read books is growing at a rapid rate. I did manage to read seven books in January, which is probably more than I managed to read the whole first half of last year. My favorites of the month were:<br />
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<i>Everything, Everything</i> was a very light and quick read. <i>Small Great Things</i> was quite the opposite and still has me thinking about it. <br />
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Last weekend was crammed with various adventures - the girls each had a turn with their daddy for their annual father/daughter dance.<br />
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There have been so many changes since their first dances, but they still look at their daddy the same way. It's such a special tradition, and I hope they cherish it forever.<br />
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This year, we added a dance performance for Ruby to the weekend, which made things a little bit complicated. Could we all just stop and have a moment of silence for tiny Ruby? I cannot believe how much she has grown, as a kid, and as a dancer. She told me she was nervous to perform, but she did SO good. I dropped Luca off with my sister and hardly knew what to do with myself as I sat in the audience and enjoyed every single second of it without chasing or wrestling a crazy two year old.<br />
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Sunday rolled around and brought church. That was the end of the productivity. My sister came over and we binged on Netflix and pho as if we didn't have anything better to do. <br />
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Oh, I did manage to cut Eisley's hair. This kid. Once she gets an idea into her head, there's no hope of ever prying it from over eager little mind. <br />
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The nostalgic side of me desperately wanted to hang onto this hair, because we have been working on growing any significant amount for nearly six years now (!!). The rational, 5 minutes late side of me knew this would be a blessing of time and patience. The thing is she would brush her hair halfway, all the way around and said she couldn't reach the rest. So then she had this...bird's nest which resulted in morning drama. So, goodbye six inches. By the time you reappear, may Eisley's arms have grown so we can brush our hair without tears and stomping. <br />
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In an effort to not be so governed by a lengthy to do list, I have generally used my mornings with Luca as a slow start to the day. I enjoy this time with him so much, and lately, I think even more. He has grown a lot as a little person lately - his vocabulary and his understanding. We can have conversations and set up an elaborate train route. I love the way he hears trains outside and yells,"Hear that? COME ON!" as he pulls me to the window to watch.<br />
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This week, I did manage to finish up our recipe organization, I filed away keepsakes, and I enrolled the girls for school next year (third grade?! hold me.) I also managed to sneak away for some much needed friend time to celebrate a sweet friend's birthday the best way that we know how - reality television and bacon wrapped lil smokies. It's how I know I'm old now - I go to these things and then spend the next 4 days catching up on sleep.<br />
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I am going to IF: Gathering with my friend Erin this weekend which I am SO excited about. And having ZERO care about the superbowl this weekend means one thing: friends and food. The end.<br />
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Happy February and Happy Weekend!<br />
<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-21741657903885635692017-01-25T16:55:00.001-07:002017-01-25T16:55:26.853-07:00recipes<br />
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Jimmy and I have been "collecting" recipes for years now. It began as somewhat of a magazine hoarding tendency. We would look through magazines and dream about various recipes, and then it turned into a guilt trip about throwing magazines away. So, stacks of magazines began their transformation. <br />
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The favorites have been torn out and placed in page protectors, and then they are placed in the appropriate section in a binder. Now, they are organized, easy to flip through, and I can get rid of the rest of the magazine.<br />
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As I mentioned <a href="http://www.thesassyone.com/2017/01/2017-and-life-lately.html#.WIkz8YU7E7B" target="_blank">here</a>, I like to choose small goals for myself for the new year. This year, I decided I was going to start actually <i>making </i>these recipes that have been sitting in binders for um...years. (It's been so long, there are multiple chicken recipes. We haven't bought chicken in about 2.5 years due to Eisley's allergy.)<br />
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Honestly, we probably need to be knocked down a couple of notches, because at this point we are feeling pretty dang good about our dinner decisions. Magazine recipe tearing out? Consider us practically professional.<br />
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I should have been more diligent about photographing our fun little cooking adventures, but it was an afterthought. I do want to share the recipes because not only have they all been delicious, but they all have been easy. All pictures have been taken from their corresponding link and any recipe changes have been noted below.<br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-t3HS-qc7h9g/WIk1_nRX2TI/AAAAAAAAJ1M/4CmasZrO378ifPBDEuNVdPBCUMZVG_fbgCLcB/s1600/FNM_100114-Baked-Cambozola-with-Pecans-and-Cranberries-Recipe_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni18col.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-t3HS-qc7h9g/WIk1_nRX2TI/AAAAAAAAJ1M/4CmasZrO378ifPBDEuNVdPBCUMZVG_fbgCLcB/s320/FNM_100114-Baked-Cambozola-with-Pecans-and-Cranberries-Recipe_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni18col.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchens/baked-cambozola-with-pecans-and-cranberries.html#!" target="_blank">Baked Cambozola with Pecans and Cranberries</a></div>
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(we used brie because it's a huge favorite around here - this dish was a hit at our NYE and a family Christmas get together.</div>
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<a href="http://www.sandralee.com/barbecue-belt-beef-sandwiches-and-french-onion-soup/" target="_blank">BBQ Belt Beef Sandwiches</a> </div>
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<a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/jeff-mauro/eggs-benedictwich-recipe.html#!" target="_blank">Jeff Mauro's Egg Benedictwich </a></div>
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-fc7d2eaZmOk/WIk4MqHwfpI/AAAAAAAAJ1k/21LNS-45vgUA4vkb80QCecwzBhcezlkvACLcB/s1600/FNM_090112-Ina-Garten-Ultimate-Grilled-Cheese-Recipe_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni12col.landscape.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-fc7d2eaZmOk/WIk4MqHwfpI/AAAAAAAAJ1k/21LNS-45vgUA4vkb80QCecwzBhcezlkvACLcB/s320/FNM_090112-Ina-Garten-Ultimate-Grilled-Cheese-Recipe_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni12col.landscape.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/ina-garten/ultimate-grilled-cheese-recipe.html" target="_blank">Ultimate Grilled Cheese</a></div>
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So, I know there have been jokes about the impossible task of finding some crazy ingredient in Ina Garten's recipe, but I can assure you that these ingredients are a) not hard to find and b) worth every effort. We have made this twice now. SO good!</div>
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<a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchens/monte-cristo-crepes.html#!" target="_blank">Monte Cristo Crepes</a></div>
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ol4SEj_q5P8/WIk5Kf-6g1I/AAAAAAAAJ1w/W5FVAjMqFQYN_VVgETvbh35rLY6oZkW0wCLcB/s1600/FNM_060116-Eggs-in-Purgatory-with-Sausage_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni12col.landscape.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ol4SEj_q5P8/WIk5Kf-6g1I/AAAAAAAAJ1w/W5FVAjMqFQYN_VVgETvbh35rLY6oZkW0wCLcB/s320/FNM_060116-Eggs-in-Purgatory-with-Sausage_s4x3.jpg.rend.sni12col.landscape.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchens/eggs-in-purgatory-with-sausage.html#!" target="_blank">Eggs in Purgatory with Sausage</a></div>
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This recipe was unlike anything I have ever made before. I liked it. We all did, actually. And I was a little worried about the sausage being too spicy, but it wasn't at all.</div>
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<a href="http://www.midwestliving.com/recipe/saucy-pulled-pork-sandwiches/" target="_blank">Saucy Pulled Pork Sandwiches</a></div>
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Slow cooker meals are always a huge bonus. This was SO good. I did not use as much paprika, and I finely diced my onions. We also add cheese to our BBQ sandwiches because we are weird like that.</div>
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There you go - all of them tried, true, and delicious.</div>
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Stay tuned for more. </div>
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-22780327322991620502017-01-18T12:26:00.001-07:002017-01-18T12:29:39.032-07:002017 and life lately I know of several people that choose a single word in place of a lofty list of resolutions. I like this idea, and support my one word with various personal (small) goals. I like having one word as a theme, and a gentle reminder for the course of the year. I wouldn't have said my word was blatantly obvious on New Year's Eve, but as the days have gone by in January, I have had a continuous reel of thoughts revolving around it.<br />
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<i>For myself, for my children, for my husband. For my friends, for my imperfect home, for the piles of laundry I didn't get around to, the goals I didn't quite accomplish. </i><i><i>For the rude stranger, for the mistakes that happen every day. </i>For my imperfect self, for my lack of ability (and desire) to spread myself in every possible direction. </i></div>
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I have been thinking a lot lately about way I want my life to look. How it looks to balance serving others and serving my family, to be able to say no and not feel an ounce of guilt over it. A friend just posted <a href="http://www.alifeinprogress.ca/?p=1065" target="_blank">this</a> last night, and it resonated so deeply with me, as it so accurately summed up my thoughts.</div>
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Here's to peace and the knowledge that we are enough this year. Even when we say no to others. An unapologetic approach about the place we are in life. Grace.</div>
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so thankful for the quiet moments we had over Christmas break. Luca is in a really fun stage where I can't leave the room - thank goodness for the ergo.<br />
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We had Christmas at my dad's this month - the Hatchimals were a huge hit.<br />
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One night, Eisley had already been tucked into bed. She came downstairs and told Jimmy she just wanted to dance with him. One doesn't say no in a situation like this. Thankful for these little precious moments and that my kids get to have such an amazing daddy.</div>
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21 months apart--oh, my heart. </div>
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I'm on a mission to find THE BEST DOUGHNUT RECIPE. So far, I haven't found it. There have been some delicious ones, but either they aren't quite right or they are good and don't keep. It's on my short list of goals for the year. Share if you have this golden secret!</div>
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And a couple of little things I don't want to forget:<br />
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Luca has this toy lizard - one of those ones that feels cringe-worthy. The other day, I stepped on it and thought I was going to die, before I realized what it was. Anyway, he has taken to placing whatever parts of his meals he doesn't wish to eat inside of its mouth. Thank goodness, they have been found quickly.<br />
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The other night, I went to my friend Erin's house for a shameful night of The Bachelor and junk food (sanity reset!). When I got home, I was in Eisley's room laying out clothes and kissing her goodnight. As I was finding something inside of her drawers, I looked at her sweet little notebook laying on top of the dresser. She has had this notebook for a few months now, and she carries it around and writes as she feels inspired. I began flipping through it and promptly had to leave the room as not to wake her. I laughed until I had tears streaming down my face. One of my favorite things about the bittersweet passing of time is that I have always been able to find something that makes that age my favorite. I love the innocence as she figures out how to write and read. Her notebook is <i>full </i>of so many random things. One of these days, I'll tell her it's too full and she needs a new one, at which time, I will tuck it away to bring smiles later.<br />
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I had no idea she was in the marines or else I would have been sending care packages and encouraging letters. She has evidently taken up a little bit of Spanish, and she finds her brother to be funny while she remains appropriate. And bodacious? No words.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-21755323323765489462016-12-30T19:05:00.001-07:002016-12-30T19:08:28.476-07:002016<br />
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So many parts of 2016 seem fairly ordinary, and some even more into the <i>just surviving </i>territory. Because if you have been around Luca or five minutes, you know he never stops moving, and not only does he never stop moving but he also doesn't sleep well at all. At times, it felt as if I kept piling things on my plate as my sleep became even less. It was a definite adjustment!<br />
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In it's entirety, 2016 was a blessed year. We spent time with family, near and far. We welcomed our brand new niece. We grew our family by a puppy. Ruby made the performance dance team at her studio, and we are still figuring out what exactly that commitment means. She loves it, and it has been a fun year for growth. I ventured solo with three kids to Florida when Luca had croup. Two friends and I had the brilliant idea to make the trek to Waco, Texas to see what the Magnolia hype was all about - so many memories. We took our annual trip to Missouri for the 4th of July, and celebrated our 9th year of marriage.<br />
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The end of the summer wrapped up swimming lessons and brought Eisley's surgery, right before she started kindergarten and Ruby started second grade.<br />
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Then football started and life became a tornado of chaos when we suddenly found a house we couldn't live without and decided we should move! We are still sorting out things from our move, and making our house into a cozy space, but as we all know, life went on anyway. We celebrated birthdays and holidays, and planned a surprise vacation, because we like to live with our plates on the full side.<br />
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Something I am so grateful for this year are my friends - so many of my moments of happiness are with my friends, and I'm thankful for them and also the realization that they are a precious gift to me.<br />
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At the beginning of this year, I wrote down words that spoke to me - ones that I needed to focus on for the year. Some have been a great work in progress, some have been a success, and some of the others, well, I just need a do-over.<br />
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One of my favorite things that I chose to do solely for myself this year was to read more. It's something that I love to do, and it has simply gotten lost in the shuffle of life. I didn't read an impressive number, but in comparison to recent years, it was a good start. My favorite book of the year (and a runner for all time) - <i>The Nightingale</i> by Kristin Hannah.<br />
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The new year alwaus holds promises of surprises. You never know what little pieces of your life are about to unfold, the new things you'll discover. I love that I get this chance to make some promises to myself, recognize what I need to work on, and dare myself to get outside of my comfort zone.<br />
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Here's to a happy, healthy, and joyous 2017.<br />
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Some of my favorite things from 2016:<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-64720763399871934812016-12-27T21:47:00.000-07:002016-12-27T21:47:07.152-07:00December<div style="text-align: center;">
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I have no actual clue how 2016 is wrapping itself up at this point. With a surprise move in the middle of football season and then so many events right on the tail of that, we have had little downtime. I'm looking forward to a calm New Year. I actually really enjoy this time of year to reflect and reset - to realize my priorities and what needs realigned in my life. This time of year is the slowest time of year, too. Empty schedule, holidays are behind - it's the simple life; just being together without distraction. And nowhere to be.<br />
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Our December hardly seems like it was longer than a few days - we had a big surprise planned for the kids. It turned out to take up quite a bit of mental room to make sure we kept it under wraps, all while getting properly prepared. On top of that, I had to take care of all things Christmas before we left on the 9th, so it all was a bit of a whirlwind (and SO worth it!).<br />
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I'll attempt this in a concise manner, but our month was jam packed and I want to remember all of it!<br />
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birthdays are always the best excuse to go and try new places.</div>
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Ruby had a dance performance at the mall -we went from there to church where the girls sang in the choir. Chaos!</div>
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Ruby got some birthday money in November and asked me how many Beanie Boos she could buy with the money. I thought to myself she must be kidding, because we already have an entire zoo of them here. As it turns out, she had no intentions of keeping any of them for herself, and instead wanted to use her money to go and buy them for the kids that would be stuck in the hospital for Christmas. Oh my, my heart. She graciously included Eisley, and together the two of them went and purchased $150 worth. They wrote a note for every single one and we delivered them to our Children's Hospital. I'm so proud to be their mama. </div>
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Which brings us to this lovely night. Haven't laughed that hard in a long time. I'm thankful for the precious friends in my life. We got together for a little Christmas party where I also need to mention that 4/6 of us received Lularoe leggings (#momlife).</div>
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Luca's first little art project - so precious and he was SO proud!</div>
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Finally...vacation time! </div>
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As you quite plainly see, our main priority was food. We ate a lot. Cruising with little kids is not quite a week of relaxation in the way that it is for some, but no cooking, no cleaning, no taxi driving - it was still a nice place to be. We stopped in Honduras, Belize, Costa Maya, and Cozumel. We didn't do much of anything at the first two - highlights included fish pedicures and drinking out of a coconut. In Costa Maya, we found a place to sit on the beach and eat HEAVENLY guacamole and salsa while the kids played in the sand.</div>
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Cozumel was our favorite - we swam with dolphins, snorkeled, and watched a sea lion show.</div>
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It's normally sort of a downer to get off of the cruise ship. Not this time: </div>
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Right around this point in the car, I gave the girls a box to open - inside were our magic bands. It was so fun to hear the excitement as they said, "best surprise ever!"<br />
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We have never stayed on Disney property when we have gone in the past, so it was neat to experience that this time, especially at Christmas. <br />
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We crammed a lot into our three days at Disney, and had an amazing time! By the end of our vacation, I was so ready to be home - to finish up Christmas things and just enjoy our family traditions.<br />
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(can we take a moment to realize that this is the first time since 2010 (I think) that there has been no crying in our Santa pictures?! My babies are growing!) </div>
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Our Christmas was wonderful - I am SO thankful for these special moments with my family. These traditions and these moments through their eyes are so beautiful.<br />
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We're ready for you, 2017.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-19912142467903556972016-11-30T14:33:00.001-07:002016-11-30T14:33:04.914-07:00holidays and stuff.<br />
I'm finishing up my last bit of Christmas shopping (!!!) and enjoying a house full of absolute silence - I mean, I can even hear the clock. This is noteworthy. Both the silence and the Christmas shopping part. I like to be mostly finished by the time December rolls around - there is much more room for enjoying our family traditions without being distracted.<br />
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We enjoyed such a fun Thanksgiving at our house this year! It was simple, but with so many people we love and doing what we love most - laughing and eating and shopping. We had background noise of football and kids screaming and laughing (and sometimes really screaming..AHEM, Luca..) and scoured the web for deals and possible shopping strategies. It was just perfect. We LOVED having our precious friends and their family here to join us this year.<br />
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definitely not the most flattering game, but so, so funny.</div>
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We have since transformed from pumpkin spice everything to CHRISTMAS! I can't believe Christmas and the end of the year is so near. </div>
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Christmas seems a little more special this year (not that I don't love it every year) - we are in our beautiful new home with all of our fun family traditions, and this year we have a big surprise up our sleeves for the kiddos. I can't wait to reveal and see their surprised little faces!</div>
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I have a to do list about a mile long, which only keeps growing. We are in the crazy season of parties and performances and the obvious holiday chaos. I have done good to limit myself to productive hours in the day so I can enjoy the rest. This has been a delicate balance with the addition of moving on top of all of this! I want my children to remember the carefully planned cookie making, the story reading, and the Christmas movie bingeing. </div>
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With that, I'm off to enjoy coffee and the aforementioned cookie planning, because - priorities.</div>
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Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-22961258470978916732016-11-03T13:27:00.003-06:002016-11-09T13:43:00.404-07:00post electionBasically, I'm positive that the recipe for the election hangover
today is friends, family, chips & salsa, and probably cookies.
Possibly wine and corny jokes, too. I can't get over the hateful nature
of everything on social media, and I hope that we can all see this as
an opportunity to come together as a nation that, at its core, loves
people, opportunity, and equality. We can't count on a leader to fix the problems, but we can all begin in our relationships. And let us all sing HALLELUJAH! that
the horrific commercials are over.<br />
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--<br />
<br />
In
other news from my happy little corner of the world - my house looks
like an episode of hoarders, the bags beneath my eyes have crossed into <i>oversized luggage </i>territory, and there is not enough coffee in the world to make me not feel tired at this point. We close on our old house tomorrow morning, which will be a tremendous weight lifted.<br />
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Our moving was put on pause briefly, while we tended to real life things - Luca's birthday, family in town, and then Halloween. <br />
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Oh, and also this little project that began under the influence of wine and friends, where we just, you know, USED POWER TOOLS and stuff to build a bench in the kitchen. Someone honestly should have been filming. There were times where it was not funny in the slightest, but now I look back at some of the way it all unfolded and just laugh my head off at the most random times.<br />
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It was well worth the stress and disapproving looks of the men at Lowe's. Now we just need a table. And how precious is my grandma with her frappucino?!<br />
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It is SO special that my grandma got to come and stay with us. She is 85 years old and still experiencing things for the first time - like handing out candy on Halloween. </div>
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It's so funny to think of the turn our lives took this year. Four months ago, we were not even considering moving. It was on the list of long term goals, but not in the foreseeable future. And then we fell in love, made our lives absolutely crazy in what is probably the worst time of the year for us, and somehow we survived.<br />
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I am so thankful. Tired and busy, but thankful.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-64206302405072899312016-11-03T13:27:00.002-06:002016-11-03T13:30:08.487-06:00hiatusIt seems the years pass and my blogging frequency declines in a predictable manner. And really, as the years have passed, I have acquired more little people, less time, and more activities that vie for my attention.<br />
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I'm reaching this point in what may have been considered a blogging identity crisis in combination with the lack of time, and I'm realizing that despite what the world may deem boring and plain - I miss the simple moments of documenting my day to day.<br />
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I know there have been undocumented periods with promises of regularly blogging. This has been my longest blogging hiatus in <i><b>eight years</b></i>. I'm going with the notion of forcing something until it becomes a habit.<br />
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My life has been far from boring since the last time, I stared at this blank page. We sold our house, bought a new one, planned a vacation, took various trips, and my baby turned two.<br />
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I'm dumping family pictures off here with the promise that I'll be back...this week. I know that soon these days that seem long will become the shortened years, and the little things will get washed away in a blur of motion. I want to lock those little things away in the safest place - to relive on a later day when they have been forgotten or dulled by the passing of time.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-5835049301649165362016-04-17T17:28:00.002-06:002016-04-17T17:38:59.581-06:00Brinley Claire<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Sunday, April 3rd.<br />
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One of those days that will be stamped with SPECIAL and filed under <i>Favorite Days of Life.</i><br />
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Months of anticipation transformed themselves into anxious moments; watching the minutes tick by and dutifully tracking contractions. I feel incredibly thankful to have been the trusted keeper of minutes and ultimately to have been a part of the most incredible experience.<br />
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I've been here before, on the other (more painful) side. Just short of 18 months ago, the roles were reversed. I kept track of the time, made time pass with nervous laughter, and I was the one bringing life into this world. It was interesting to note the things that changed when I switched roles in the delivery room, and even more interesting-- the things that didn't. <br />
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Saturday was full of clock watching, some walking, some sushi, some pampering, and even some crying. We analyzed the numbers in the possible birth dates for the 12th time in the last two weeks - something Meredith and I discovered we had in common. This would soon come up again as we guessed the exact minute that she would make her big debut. Jimmy made everyone pancakes for dinner, and shortly after, a basketball game became background noise as contraction intensity was calculated.<br />
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Those early contractions filled my home with anxious and excited energy superior to that of Christmas morning. I was far more anxious than I imagined (I tucked that away only for me to know). We left for the hospital shortly before midnight - my mind raced in a thousand different directions.<br />
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Looking back, it seems like it was days and mere minutes all at once. It was <i>hard </i>to watch my sister in pain, it was hard hearing the lack of progress at certain points, and it was hard being unable to do anything about it.<br />
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And despite that fact that parts were hard to watch, it was all sorts of beautiful. My sister's husband was amazing - so involved and so supportive. We had Sam Smith Radio playing - the perfect soundtrack for the intensity, the anticipation, and the love and the laughter. I will forever associate Sam Smith, Adele, and the like to my niece's sweet birthday. There were jokes and laughter, snacks and coffee runs, and a whole lot of monitor watching woven right into all of the minutes.<br />
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As most normal people got ready to begin their Sunday, we had surpassed the 24 hours mark of being wide-eyed and wondering. We were getting our breakfast and hoping for a positive progress report soon.<br />
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Beyond 9 am on Sunday, the news got better and better each time we received it. The exhaustion transformed into energy; worried faces into smiles.<br />
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At 2:08 pm, my sister gave one last rock star push and sweet Brinley Claire showed her precious face. A moment I will never, ever forget - her first breath, her perfect, tiny face, the way she stared at her mama for <i>hours</i>.<br />
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So many tears - I don't have words to adequately describe standing by Meredith's side as she fell in love at first sight. It was all so surreal, so breathtaking. <br />
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Life is so, so precious.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-66183797700153078132016-04-14T19:17:00.001-06:002016-04-14T19:25:45.431-06:00surrender<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm wondering what sort of notarized official document needs to happen to divorce my house from the germs, because holy heck. <i>I am DONE.</i><br />
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Monday showed up with a delightful gift of strep for the second time in three weeks (Ruby).<br />
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Tuesday showed itself the door after leaving Luca with a faucet nose and a cough to match.<br />
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Wednesday was the day that I completely lost my mind with the sudden onset of drama - our poor little Dexter Dog has joined the germ party and has somehow picked up giardia. It remains a mystery how he would have gotten this, but I can assure you from watching him, it's nothing anyone ever wants to have or to clean. I spent yesterday juggling a sick baby, sick dog, and the complete routine of disinfecting the house (Jimmy did the yard).<br />
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And by golly, how could Thursday be left out of these shenanigans?!<br />
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Midnight brought puking from Luca. Hours and hours and hours of puking. Enough towels, bedding, and clothing for five loads of laundry. And he isn't done. I have literally never seen so much vomit, and you know how it is with a baby that has absolutely no concept of puking into something -- chasing the heaves with a cupped towel in hopes of saving everything around you. Everything is calculated - how quickly can I move him away from all bedding, all carpet? Analyzing every breath, in case its the onset of more throwing up. He has had four baths at this point. And that's been the minimum that I could get away with.<br />
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We have moved into <i>painful </i>territory in terms of the amount of Sesame Street that we have watched.<br />
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My couches are housing just about every towel and linen that I own. Sadly, the washer is still running, and the laundry is not caught up.<br />
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I have not slept in two days.<br />
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And the puke. Oh, the puke.<br />
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And if you could imagine the way a conversation (and by conversation, I mean 893 discussions) with a very busy boy about how we have to stay still on the pile of towels - you can imagine the resulting gray hairs.<br />
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Waving the white flag here. Friday, you know what to do.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-38694951939793317592016-03-29T21:32:00.002-06:002016-04-07T14:15:19.455-06:00one day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The smell of browned butter and the resulting cookies lingers in my kitchen. There is an accompanying (but not complimentary) smell of chlorine-drenched pool towels. The rain has slowed, but the smell is in my nostrils, like a permanent reminder that Spring is somewhere around here.<br />
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My house has signs of <i>Tuesday </i>all over it. The aforementioned towels and other swim paraphernalia, the day's dishes, a load of laundry waiting to be escorted off to its proper place. Baby toys strewn all over every square inch of the living room. The Hobby Lobby evidence is positively incriminating, lying all over the counter. I have a lengthy list of <i>to dos</i> and <i>should be doings, </i>but there's this overwhelming draw to just<i> be. </i>Jimmy is gone, and so of course the opportunities are endless - Last night's Dancing with the Stars, more sewing, rekindled knitting romance, or maybe even a book. Plus, those cookies that miraculously made it to the cookie phase of their delicious little lives.<br />
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My kids are fresh out of the baths and sound asleep just feet from me. Aside from the thoughts of FREEDOM! my mind feels neatly compartmentalized and my heart feels full. This is not always the case - for so much of the last seventeen months (without mentioning names, ahem.) I have been such a hot mess. I forget the craziest things, remember the stupid things, and feel like I can pull myself to some semblance of presentable just in time to make myself five minutes late to wherever I am going. And if I achieved anything further than clothes on my body, then you can be certain there are 29 shirts on the floor of my closet, makeup littering my bathroom counter, and what may look like a burglary through the rest of my home.<br />
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I don't know what has clicked into place, and I most certainly don't have it all figured out. I mean, listen, my 17 month old sleeps in his infant seat because he absolutely will not stand for anything else. You'd make money betting on me washing the same load of clothes more than once. Sometimes more than twice. And sometimes I do my best impression of a monstery ogre just to get everyone out the door.<br />
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I don't have it all together, but I have this realization that life is such a short phase. With every passing day, I grow more aware of the things that really, truly matter. My grandpa turned 90 last week. <b>Ninety.</b> And while he remembers impressive bits from long ago, I know that so many things have slipped through the cracks. Things that once brought smiles to his face, things that irritated the life out of him, and things he thought he may never forget.<br />
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One day, I won't sweep the floor 3 times a day.<br />
I won't have tiny little people animatedly eating at my table.<br />
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One day, I won't be combing through closets with a flashlight to lay out the next day's clothes.<br />
They'll have their own fashion opinion and the ability to form fashion conscience decisions without me.<br />
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One day, I won't rock a baby to sleep. 38 times before 10 pm.<br />
He'll walk down the hall and crawl into bed himself and I'll see him in the morning.<br />
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One day, I won't spend every night fishing trains from beneath couches, placing Barbies in their homes, and neatly stacking books.<br />
Our living room will be rid of toys.<br />
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One day, I'll have myself together and arrive at places early.<br />
Because I won't have three people that need me to fetch snacks and search for shoes and brush unruly hairs into place.<br />
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One day, we won't be 30 minutes late for bedtime.<br />
They won't ask me for one more book. <br />
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One day, I won't be driving the mom shuttle to school and ballet and swimming.<br />
They'll drive themselves.<br />
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One day, Jimmy and I won't remember how we once mastered the art of rolling dice like quiet ninjas in a heated game of Yahtzee.<br />
We won't have a precious, sleeping baby in our room. <br />
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One day, I won't be the center of their world.<br />
They'll find other people to love and places to be. <br />
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One day, I won't have such a difficult decision with how to spend my free time, because I'll have enough of it and my babies will have grown.<br />
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So for now, I think there are cookies that need to be had, blessings to be counted, and laundry that can wait until tomorrow.<br />
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I'm thankful for the symbolic workload today, even when it's tedious and overwhelming. There are blessings everywhere, neatly woven in the chaos.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-44300975769846957642016-03-07T12:37:00.000-07:002016-03-07T12:37:11.168-07:00it's March.First of all - the nose situation is a chapter slammed shut. My biopsy results showed a benign mass of tissue and my nose is nearly pain-free now. I'm so thankful to move on from a very scary situation.<br />
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Secondly, we are days from meeting my precious niece - my sister asked me to take a few maternity photos. She makes it look so good, she <i>almost </i>makes me want to be pregnant again. <br />
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<i>gorgeous mama.</i></div>
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In other news, it's March now. MARCH! We are making plans for summer - girls trips and recitals and family get togethers. Spring Break is upon us, and the end of the school year is in sight. Hard to believe, since Christmas was basically yesterday.</div>
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I closed out February with a much needed girl's getaway with some precious friends. Look, I know Disney Junior believes it's where the magic begins, but it's not. The magic begins at the rental car place when you place yourself into a car a fraction the size of your family car, and wouldn't you know it, this one has ZERO cheerios flying around. Also not seen in tiny car: shoes without their mates, coloring books, tiaras, and naked barbies. It was the first time I left Luca and I figured it might be the last (have we discussed the fact that he is 16 months old and still doesn't sleep? Probably not, I'm too tired to get into it.) He did sleep on his best behavior (which is still waking up several times - he just controlled the screaming part of it), so I think I might get to get away again sometime in the future!</div>
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The magic continued with Starbucks, an entire car ride without the word MOM! and then a weekend full of laughter and food and relaxation. We hardly knew how to be without tiny people needing us. There was some part of it that was very surreal - like a junior high style sleepover (there was Fuller House, Backstreet Boys, and hair dying involved, afterall!) but not. I am so very thankful for these precious people to laugh with, cry with, and celebrate the little things along with the big ones with. </div>
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<br />Jimmy went golfing when I got home - we attempted a walk and then Eisley threw a fit over her bike after we made the long trek to the sidewalk in front of our next door neighbors. </div>
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That's where the magic ended.</div>
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<i>we take suckers with our haircuts around here - I have lost count on his haircuts now! </i></div>
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Luca is practically climbing the curtains these days, and I think my poor heart has its work cut out. This kid - yikes! He is a busy little monkey, and I constantly feel as if I have no idea what I'm doing with this mom thing.</div>
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Things for the mind vault:</div>
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Eisley's obsession with the word "properette" which is actually the word <i>proper.</i></div>
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Ruby's toothless smile - she is finally getting one of her top front teeth in, and I know she is going to look so different; just like she did when her tiny little baby teeth came in.</div>
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The way Jimmy and I stay up late to play yahtzee - being quiet with dice is a fun challenge.</div>
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My quiet mornings with Luca. Luca loves Elmo - obsessed, really - and I can get quite a few things done while he eats breakfast and watches. The mornings with the two of us feel slow and perfect. </div>
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The way Luca fits perfectly into my lap, asking for books.</div>
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The sound of my girls singing in the car.</div>
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The way Ruby sometimes offers a compromise and does a little curtsy while speaking.</div>
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Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-19153051686174059342016-03-03T14:49:00.001-07:002016-03-03T14:49:34.806-07:00Happy Birthday, Eisley!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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To my sweet, sweet girl--</div>
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Eisley, you turn FIVE today! I always imagine you to be about 18 months old, so as you could imagine, this seems quite shocking to me. It's funny to imagine you then and imagine you now - some things are different, some things are very much the same, but it has been such a blessing to watch you blossom!</div>
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You came into this world and let everyone know how devastated you were over your eviction; you continue you make sure your opinions are heard, loud and clear, but you are more discreet around strangers.</div>
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Recently, you got a hole in your jeans at school, and I asked you about it. Hours later, you said, "I can't stop worrying about this hole in my jeans!" It was such a humorous, reflective moment for me because in that moment, I thought to myself "She is ME!" I have always known you and I are programmed very similarly, it makes parenting you fairly easy because I know how I am! </div>
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You have the funniest facial expressions - most recently added to your repertoire, the eyebrow raising. You pick up expressions and you still have your way of saying certain things (father/daughter dance will always be known as The Chicken Dance in our house), and I also happen to really love "swanwich."</div>
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You love to write and tell stories. You love arts and crafts, and you love barbies. You love tiny little objects that are easy to hoard in your collection of bags. You love princesses and have a special place in your heart for stuffed animals. Hundreds of them.<br />
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You also really love all animals, particularly horses, dogs and cats. You just recently changed your future job dreams to veterinarian!<br />
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You are really easy to please and could easily entertain yourself with the simplest of things. As long as there are snacks nearby - you ask for a snack approximately 189 times every single day. <br />
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I worried a little bit about making you a middle child, but you have taken the role and made it so perfectly fitting for you. You love to play with Ruby, you are okay to play by yourself, and you are the best big sister to Luca! You are such a great compliment to both of them.<br />
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You told me you could never stop growing even though I asked otherwise, and that you were most excited to turn five so maybe you could loose a tooth!<br />
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You love our family movie nights, you also love to watch Peppa Pig and Max and Ruby. You enjoy playing Candy Land and we often have to search your collections of little things for the pieces.<br />
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<br />
You close out each day with your question quota met - somewhere in the 200s. You keep me accountable for promises I made two years ago, and I love that about you!<br />
<br />
I can't believe you are five today, it seems surreal and impossible. It has been such an honor to be your mama for the last five years - the growth, the laughs, the love. You are impossibly cute and so hilarious. <br />
<br />
We love you to the moon!<br />
<br />
XOXO,<br />
MamaHillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-7709827316154236862016-02-11T20:25:00.000-07:002016-02-11T20:25:03.149-07:00the nose saga continues<br />
<br />
The nose situation.<br />
<br />
I had the bump in my nose surgically removed yesterday and I severely underestimated the accompanying pain. On a scale of 1-10, it was a strong <i>I'm probably going to die.</i> Seriously, had nose job ever been on my bucket list, it most certainly wouldn't be now. Childbirth would have been preferred. And the way that I can't move my mouth now - I'll probably keep botox off of my list too. And if I said that to you in person, it would sound like: "I'll frolly keet votox off of vy list too." And then I would let my drink spill out of my mouth because I can no longer drink from a cup now, either. I'm classy like that.<br />
<br />
On a serious note, I am waiting for the pathology results, and hopefully this will be the last I deal with this situation. It's scary to hear your doctor tell you that he has been in his line of work for a very long time and he has no clue what it might be. Trust is something I'm working on. That, and patience. And not googling. I'm ready to close this chapter of scary thoughts that interrupt my daily life. <br />
<br />
I have been absolutely blown away with countless thoughtful messages that have just poured in. Thoughts and prayers and requests to bring dinner and take kiddos. I have the sweetest friends - friends I don't feel like I deserve, but I just feel empowered with their presence and their thoughtfulness. <br />
<br />
--<br />
<br />
I can't remember if I mentioned this or not, but Luca has had what I have suspected as a dairy sensitivity for months now. It has been very obvious to me for many months, I think it became a conscious thought when he began eating table food. He has been tested and is not actually allergic, but upon the doctor's advice, I took him off of absolutely every trace of dairy for two weeks to ensure it was indeed that (it was, he was a new kid). This week, I have allowed him to eat some of it. His sleeping is back to worse than newborn status. So, we're done with that for quite awhile.<br />
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<i>he may be cute, but there is no one cute enough to make up for regular all nighters.</i></div>
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The girls and Jimmy continued their tradition of father/daughter dances - it was Ruby's fourth year to go! I hope they will continue this tradition long into the teenage years. I hope they will always look up to him with such adoring smiles. I hope they will always know how much he cherishes them, and that they find someone else who does the same. </div>
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That's it (oh, and the baby shower - success! Details to come) - waiting on nose results, waiting for the pain to disappear, and trusting God that all will be well.</div>
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So many thanks to my unbelievable friends that have loved on me through a scary time!</div>
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<br /><br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-5866686436825620682016-02-01T17:58:00.001-07:002016-02-01T17:59:37.283-07:00embrace the chaos and some nose drama<br />
<br />
I always imagine January to be this beautiful, calm month - the hustle and bustle over, life slowed down, probably sipping coffee while taking in the snowy landscape. But not so snowy that life is complicated. <br />
<br />
Here we are, January is over, and I feel like it mostly put me in a blender, turned it on and laughed its head off at me. We started the year with a bloody bang - my nose wouldn't stop bleeding. And it has done nothing but cause me issues since. I have seen three doctors who are all equally perplexed, and I'm waiting for my insurance to approve the surgery to have it removed and sent to pathology. I'm not thrilled at the circus this has been, but there is something slightly humorous about it all. <br />
<br />
The schools became extra needy with various projects in January - costumes and family photo requests, show and tell, all about me posters. KINDERGARTEN REGISTRATION (I can't even.)<br />
<br />
And so much of this sprung up when I decided on a road trip with my little elmo-loving companion. So a quick and simple road trip turned out to be an array of lists and instructions, followed by texting reminders to go hunt for various costume pieces. And trial hairdo options for the husband to do his best at not sending tiny hobos to school while I was away.<br />
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<br />
Ruby asked for a sewing machine for Christmas and Aunt Sara and Uncle Phil delivered - I was so excited at this being on her wishlist. This is a hobby that I can get behind! She chose to make Luca a blanket for her first project, and has since decided she is "an awesome sewer!" and has a list of projects to make for just about everyone in her life.<br />
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Sorry, Jimmy, about the fabric bills. <br />
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<i>just because roses from the husband and baby straw faces - not much cuter.</i></div>
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My grandma is set to visit this week which is a big deal and such a treat - so we decided to plan Mere's shower around her arrival. I also have a tea and two dances to coordinate this weekend. Maybe after that the calm comes? Doubtful.</div>
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So yes, shower things. I have been busy crafting and buying ruffles and tulle and such. I'm excited for this weekend, and also so excited for this sweet baby girl to arrive!</div>
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I'm crossing my fingers for fewer obligations and I'm also learning how to prioritize my time. It's a work in progress, so for now, I'm embracing the chaos.</div>
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-36879224069675583172016-01-19T14:20:00.000-07:002016-01-19T14:36:54.788-07:00blank space<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Two months gone. The longer this place sits
vacant, the more daunting it becomes to write again. The lack of words
and memories and photos certainly isn't a reflection of life at the
moment, but more of a reflection of the amount of things I am currently
juggling and a lack of time to cram a tired, fifteen minute writing
session in at the end of the day when littles are sleeping.<br />
<br />
With
that said, it's a new year; something that promises the beginning of
new things, continued work on old goals, and a list of new ones. <br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>(and as always, snippets of life are on instagram: hilmarhan - it's quick and easy to post there)</i><br />
<br />
The
last two months passing by so quickly are such an accurate
representation of life - I want to keep track of the fun things, the
ugly things, and the parts that we will laugh and cry about for years to
come.<br />
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<br />
<i> </i><br />
Highlights (and excuses for not writing) that missed the blog<i>:</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
We met Brandon Heath this fall - he played guitar and sang "Jesus in
Disguise" with Ruby and Eisley in a moment they will never forget<i>. </i>The <i>God Thing </i>moments
that fell into place when we moved here are numerous - one of my very
favorites includes being tossed deep into the Christian music scene.
It's such an amazing feeling to have my girls sing along to the songs.
We were moved deeply with this particular experience.<br />
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<br />
Jimmy
came home one evening in October and told me to pack my stuff and be
ready to leave to a surprise destination in mere days. We left bright
and early (with Luca along for the fun) and we landed in Seattle! It
was such a fun surprise and we had an amazing long weekend eating our
way through the city. We also got to visit my brother and sister in law
which was so fun!<br />
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<br />
We
returned from Seattle to two little girls who were spoiled rotten with
fun and treats by Papa and Cici. And I dove right into birthday
planning for Luca (party details: <a href="http://www.thesassyone.com/2015/11/woodland-first-birthday.html#.Vp6cEFLytD0" target="_blank">here</a>), and then straight into a gender reveal for my sister and her husband. <br />
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<br />
There
is a whole lot of power in that little envelope that I held, and a
whole lot of pressure too! The news isn't new anymore, but I am so
thrilled...<br />
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My
niece, Miss Brinley Claire, will be here in March (or possibly April).
It's so exciting to buy bows and tiny sparkled shoes and ruffles again!<br />
<br />
<br />
And that night, we dressed up for Halloween and celebrated with Aunt Sara and Uncle Phil!<br />
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November was a milestone month for Luca - he began walking and got his first haircut!<br />
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(he has had three since!)<br />
<br />
--- <br />
<br />
Sadly, we also experienced loss this fall. We lost Jimmy's Grandpa and we lost our beloved yorkie, Pippi. <br />
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<br />
<br />
I
can't put into words the amount of love my girls held for that dog, and
she was the best dog. Sadly, she left her mark on us early, and we
have to love her through memories now. And giving my children that news
was the hardest thing I have had to do as a parent thus far - absolutely
soul crushing.<br />
<br />
In a twist of answered prayers for us, we
found a puppy to love. Through many teary conversations and prayers, we
decided to go for it. And although we will never replace our sweet Pip,
we are so thankful to get to have another puppy to love.<br />
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Meet Dexter (who was almost named George):<br />
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He is the sweetest, snuggliest, perfect little healing therapy for our family.<br />
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--<br />
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Our
big to do for 2015 was Disney. We spent two weeks in Florida. It was
fun to see months of planning and dreaming come alive in a truly magical
way for our kiddos. That can't possibly be narrowed down to a quick
summary or a few photos (find some on instagram: hilmarhan) - perhaps
I'll get a post out on our trip before this year is over.<br />
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Phew. Longest recap ever. With that out of the way, I am hopeful I can get back into the swing of things. <br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-85134592225977458922015-11-17T10:20:00.000-07:002015-11-17T10:20:27.171-07:00Ruby is 7<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Dear Ruby,</div>
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You are SEVEN. I feel this way with the change of every year, but it just sounds so...old! I told you on your birthday that I remembered so clearly the day you were born - it was hard for me to believe that it was so long ago!</div>
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We celebrated with a pile of balloons and seven-shaped cinnamon rolls on your special day. We also sent balloons and a teddy bear to be delivered to school. You were so excited to go eat dinner at Texas Roadhouse (your pick!) so that you could sit on the saddle and they would sing to you!</div>
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You have always had the kindest, most loving heart of anyone that I know. I went to your parent/teacher conference at school a couple of weeks ago and listened to your teacher get emotional as she told me that she was inspired by you, that you would lay down your life for your friends and that you always put others' needs before your own.<br />
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I began to tear up as she spoke - I am just so proud of you. And the timing of her telling me that she was inspired was quite ironic. Days before, I had discovered a vivid and imaginative song you wrote about what it might be like to find yourself in Heaven and I cried my eyes out - just then, I told Daddy that it seems so humbling to be inspired by the heart of a (then) six year old.<br />
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You were absolutely made to be a big sister and you are the best at it! You are so patient and eager to teach things to Eisley and Luca. They adore you, and look up to you, and love you like crazy.<br />
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You are loving reading! Currently, you are about 100 pages into<i> Little House in the Big Woods </i>- I hope you always soak up books like that.<br />
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You also really enjoy our family movie and game nights. You love to help me in the kitchen, and you love to help out with most anything around the house. You have recently decided that you want to learn to sew - I am so excited to watch your precious little heart grow big to carry so many things that you love.<br />
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I love you more than you could ever know - you are precious to us, and such a perfect gift! <br />
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XOXO<br />
MamaHillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-3971472569477218412015-11-02T18:42:00.000-07:002015-11-02T18:47:52.507-07:00a very woodland first birthday<br />
This has been the craziest month...possibly of my life. Jimmy flew me on a surprise trip to Seattle, I threw a gender reveal for my sister (!!!!), we had company, I had parties, hosted a game night, and organized crafts for our MOPS group. All deserve their own blog posts and all have been fun, but I'm glad to see November where I am likely mistaken in the belief that life is about to calm down.<br />
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We threw Luca's 1st birthday party last weekend - my very precious friend, Rebecca came to celebrate with us and captured all of these fun memories.<br />
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(favor tags and cupcake toppers were purchased from <a href="https://www.etsy.com/shop/PaperPartyParade" target="_blank">here</a>.)<br />
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picture boards - Hobby Lobby</div>
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prints - <a href="http://www.socialprintstudio.com/" target="_blank">Social Print Studio</a></div>
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pinecone cheeseballs and woodland sandwiches (critters found at Joann's)<br />
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he was over it at this point.</div>
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so much chaos; so much love - I feel blessed that our house was FULL to celebrate our little boy!<br />
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sweet, sweet friend (and her sweet, sweet baby boy in her belly)<br />
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Happy Birthday, sweet little critter. We love you so.<br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-62121218263258719892015-10-26T17:05:00.002-06:002015-10-26T17:05:25.554-06:00Happy Birthday, Luca<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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To the sweetest boy on his 1st birthday,<br />
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My pregnancy seemed to last about five years, while the first year of your life seemed to last about five minutes. I have spent the last week with all sorts of nostalgia and thoughts about life before and after you. I can hardly believe you are now considered a toddler.<br />
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You weigh 21 pounds and you are 29 inches tall. You are the busiest little person I know. You took off and walked across the room the day before your birthday. You actually sort of skipped walking and ran/galloped before catching yourself. You think anything will catch you and you will often just fall into your sisters, hoping they got the memo. I think you'll be walking within the next week and I know we are in big trouble!<br />
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We have had a maaaajor sleep regression problem in the last month or more. One visit to the chiropractor made the waking up bearable (compared to the 30 minutes of sleep at a time before that), but you are still a horrible sleeper. I think there is something upsetting your tummy (I believe it's dairy) but we haven't gotten anything official regarding that.<br />
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You have seven teeth, and are working on number 8 (fourth one on the bottom) - maybe that will be another answer for the sleeping problem.<br />
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I have loved watching you learn so much this year, but this month, you just seem like a little boy. You know what to do with cars and you love to drive them all over the floor. You know when things are upside down (your cups), and recently, you crawled right over to the cabinet with a piece of trash in your hand, and you threw it in the trash! You also love to pick up socks and hats, and attempt to put them on your body where they belong. You learned how to drink from a straw this month which has been just as amusing for us at has been for you.</div>
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You came to Seattle with me and daddy this month, and you were such a good boy. It was hilarious to push you in the stroller because you are a magnet for attention. You wave and smile and charm the pants off of everyone that you see. You are social until someone makes a big deal out of it, and then you try your best to bury your face in something nearby.<br />
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You do well at signing and you have added Da-da and "all done" to your word list this month (still waiting on mama...you know, the one who feeds you and wakes up with you and makes sure you are happy at all times...yes, that one). You have something that you yell when you are looking for Ruby and Eisley but it's nothing I could repeat and it certainly doesn't quite sound like their names just yet.<br />
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This year has been such a blessing - sometimes, I still can't believe I get to be mama to such a beautiful baby boy! I am honored to watch you learn and grow.<br />
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I love you so much, sweet boy!!<br />
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XOXO,<br />
Mama<br />
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<i>PS - you only eat icing and cake makes you gag, so I'm not entirely sure you're my child. You are also about the daintiest cake smasher I have ever seen.</i><br />
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<br />Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-58476750265731838422015-09-29T22:44:00.003-06:002015-09-29T22:44:30.605-06:00I'm done hurrying.I'm sitting here indulging what is likely the lone brain cell remaining, the one that desires an oreo. Fine, <i>oreos</i>.<br />
<br />
Because the last two weeks have been a circus. Only there is no cotton candy and the lion tamer is me. Kid tamer.<br />
<br />
The
dishwasher decided to choke on the detergent and got a big F for effort
as it half-heartedly sloshed it all over the dishes. I wonder how it
knew that I LOVE hand washing. And not to be outdone, the washer quit last week and the only serviceman under our warranty will be unavailable until October 16th. Convenient. I'm not sure how to convey to them my need for my washing machine. Days before ours turned in its letter of resignation, I was literally dreaming about how lovely it would be to have two washers. Maybe it felt a sense of betrayal.<br />
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In all seriousness, it has hit the fan around here. I'm so tired, I am dreaming about sleeping at a hotel for a solid week. Nights have turned into my hours of reserved torture, and by morning, I can't even dream of bedtime, because bedtimes are so horrible. So I dream of aforementioned trip to the hotel. Then reality knocks.<br />
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It all came spilling out my eyes today, and later, it came out from somewhere within. Two hours, today. Two hours of this nap time battle with Luca. At some point, it came to the point where we both stared at one another through tear-filled eyes, me begging him to sleep. The no cry sleep solution worked I went to get balloons today and didn't have the presence of mind to determine transportation with a giant bouquet of balloons. You can imagine how this played out, except you can't, because I literally lost my mind in an embarrassing act that would have done a three year old proud. I popped three of them and with every subsequent burst, I cried a little harder as my children looked on, horrified. Shameful. The tears continued as I struggled to make them stop; I was absolutely humiliated that the balloons sent me over the edge and that I subjected my children to such a train wreck.<br />
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This exhaustion? It's paralyzing. It has stolen all shreds of patience and kindness and love, and I'm left with the inability to just <i>do life</i> in a pleasant manner. I have never known this level of sleep deprivation. I have faked it until I made it many times, and I'm beyond that point now. I have avoided friends and social obligations because I am sure I'll come off as a drunk, lunatic, or some combination that will likely be unwelcome at all future engagements.<br />
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As I tumbled down to what I can only hope was rock bottom today, I began reflecting on the things that have changed in life. We are busy. I don't like to overuse that term and I do like having things on the schedule, but it becomes a delicate balance...and a recipe for disaster in times like this. It's more than the exhaustion I can't catch up. There's this sense of dread when I start the day, because I have overfilled my plate, and I know that I can't possibly get everything done. I have a desire to please people, so I say yes. I fill my schedule with things for other people, on top of a life that I spend doing things for the people in my family. Do you know how many invitations I have for various events on my facebook at this very moment? NINE. I feel this sense of dread every time I get one! <br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DhNhuaj_9oY/VgtgyFvV88I/AAAAAAAAJK0/pkSoAidSgCM/s1600/8469e191f4c34043404e111082dd2340.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DhNhuaj_9oY/VgtgyFvV88I/AAAAAAAAJK0/pkSoAidSgCM/s1600/8469e191f4c34043404e111082dd2340.jpg" /></a>We have places to be and deadlines to meet, and so often, I am guilty of hurrying my children along as we rush from one place to another. I move through things on autopilot, without a pause to be grateful, as I take in life around me. <br />
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<br />
I can remember life where technology wasn't in the
forefront. We lived for playing on the floor with Ruby, the milestones
she hit, and there wasn't this sense of urgency in daily things like bath time, our bedtime routine, eating meals, and getting out the door. <br />
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Where is that life? Now, there is this pressure to GO GO GO GO GO and put your kid in all the activities so they can experience everything. Why? It's everywhere - this ungrateful, hurried, and absolutely draining way of living. It's in the mail, on the outside of envelopes - HURRY! DON'T MISS OUT! & LAST CHANCE!, it's on billboards and restaurants - HURRY IN TODAY! Don't know the answer to something? Google it RIGHT NOW. All of it creates this sense of panicked urgency.<br />
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This hurrying is a sickness. Hurrying life, feeling stressed in the meantime, missing out on the things that happened while you hurried, and for what? Time goes by quickly enough on its own! I know this so well. And while I certainly don't want this sleep situation to last for much longer, I also know that this is the last of babyhood. I can't wish this away, because as this fades into the background of my memory, so will the images of his sweet face that belong with it. <br />
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This week, I'm promising myself and my family to live for the small moments, the in between. I'm vowing to be patient, to breathe life in, rather than hurrying it along. If we arrive two minutes late with smiles on our faces, as opposed to two minutes early (or even two minutes late) after me shouting to get out the door, I'm calling it a win. There's a reason my kids don't hurry. They don't see the need, they haven't been tainted with this mindset that the world sells. Life is some marriage of crazy and beautiful, isn't it? It's crazy to me that this overwhelming feeling of tiredness won't even be on my radar in the years to come; likely, it will only be a shred of a memory in which I can't even accurately recall. With all of this hurrying comes missing out on things, things that I want to savor forever. Memories that aren't properly cataloged because I wasn't present.<br />
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I might still be exhausted tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, but I don't have to let it consume my attitude. <br />
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Next week, I will whittle my schedule to fit the priorities and nothing beyond. These years are fleeting. This life is fleeting. And if I keep hurrying, I'm going to miss it.<br />
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Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-70064167914667866402015-09-23T21:39:00.001-06:002015-09-23T21:39:53.003-06:00dear Luca<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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to our little prince charming,<br />
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I don't know how in the world this is it - the last big month before you turn ONE. I may be calculating your age in months until you are 18, because I can't understand how this has happened. You are weighing in at 20.4 pounds and you are 28.25 inches tall (20th and 12th percentiles).<br />
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I'm mostly shocked that you aren't walking at this point! You stood up and cruised so early, I thought for sure we would have hit that milestone at this point. You got very brave last week and took six steps, so more trouble is right around the corner. I can't imagine the madness we are in for when this all comes together for you. And I think we need to <i>actually </i>baby proof this time around.<br />
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Your sleeping has been the best this month, but it remains all over the place. Two nights this week, you were up for the day at 5:00 am and I very nearly died. Last night, you slept for twelve hours solid, and I feel like I could probably rule the world with another night or two of that sort of sleep.<br />
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You had a well baby check up this month; the doctor got quite a kick out of you and your ways. She tried to check your eyes with her light, and you squinted so tightly, she couldn't check a thing! <br />
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You have five teeth, very close to six (fourth one is coming in on the top). This is a different teething pattern than Ruby and Eisley, so we'll see where the next one pops up. The third and fourth bottom ones don't seem to be anywhere close yet.<br />
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You are quite the entertainer and love to make your sisters laugh. You also chime in with your funny little giggles when you hear others laughing.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ug4Xgd8y9UE/VgNlvfQc9iI/AAAAAAAAJJk/gNd3qTqeyeQ/s1600/IMG_8125wm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ug4Xgd8y9UE/VgNlvfQc9iI/AAAAAAAAJJk/gNd3qTqeyeQ/s640/IMG_8125wm.jpg" width="426" /></a>This month has been really fun to watch you soak up the world around you. You know that the remote turns the fan/lights on, you are very into mimicking sounds and actions. You love to give kisses and hugs (just laying your head down), play peekaboo, and you also can do TOUCHDOWN! The girls have taught you to RAWWWR and you do it right back to them.<br />
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Your little vocabulary has just taken off. You say: go, dog, hi, yeah, boo, and some variation of thank you. You can sign for "milk" and "more" and we are working on your manners.<br />
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Despite the not walking part, you are so, so busy. I have had to give up an actual portion of myself - the germaphobe - because I just can't contain you. You crawl across floors that make me nauseous to think about. I think it may be a preparation of what the path looks like ahead. Yikes!<br />
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You love to play with toys (and things that aren't toys) as long as you can stop by for a snuggle and you can see me at all times. I try to enjoy this part, because I know those days aren't forever. I like that you can stop exploring to love on me, and that you <i>need </i>it to be comforted.<br />
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<br />
Birthday preparations are under way. I hardly know how to process that. The last eleven months have been the fastest year of my entire life. I don't know what our future holds, and I certainly never envisioned life with you, but I can't imagine life without you. This crazy, wonderful, adventure of life was made so much sweeter with you!<br />
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We love you more than words can say!<br />
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XOXO,<br />
Mama<br />
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Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-18578742520348827182015-09-17T22:10:00.001-06:002015-09-17T23:29:14.836-06:00oh, this life<br>
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With an impressive number of pumpkin spice lattes tallied and the afternoon air carrying whispers of fall, I have a full and happy heart. Jimmy has toned down his couch-side football coaching as not to wake the baby. This means he <i>whisper yells </i>and claps the side of his leg with his hand that doesn't hold Luca. You know, instead of RAWWWWRRRRing at the television and pounding his fists together and pacing the room.<br>
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I celebrated a birthday last week which had me reeling before it even began. Trepidation quickly turned into overwhelming feelings of gratefulness with how much love I received all week. My friends surprised me with a night out for dinner, and the messages and the gifts that poured in left me with this reminder of how amazing it is to be here, to be so loved, to celebrate another year.<br>
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Also, a precious friend stopped by today to bring a gift, bringing my final birthday mug tally to FIVE. And all I can do is smile, because my friends? They know me so well; mugs are a part of my love language.<br>
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<i>Aunt Moo pulled Ruby's top tooth on the 13th - I can't imagine what she will look like with a mouth full of grown up teeth.</i></div>
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I seem to have this habit of overbooking myself which is something I am working on and probably riding that D/F grade line. I like to live on the dangerous side. And truth be told, I do like having things to do and purposes to fulfill, but there is a teeny, tiny line to walk before I slip into the land of the overwhelmed. I'm figuring out the delicate balance of this as we have once again rearranged schedules with Eisley starting school.<br>
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There is one night during the week that Jimmy isn't here for bed time and if I thought that was hard last year when I was pregnant and sick, it's nearly impossible now. I felt a new mom low when I was juggling an overtired baby at the time I should have been brushing teeth and reading stories. Ruby - oh, my sweet Ruby, brushed her own teeth and her sister's, and I walked into her finishing up <i>flossing </i>Eisley's teeth and I was able to kiss them both. This mom thing is hard, but then I find them like this; paying attention to details and acting with such care and love and I am hopeful that I'm doing some of it right. A couple weeks ago, Eisley rocked and sang Luca to sleep. TO SLEEP! Something that doesn't come easy for me. The following text chimed on Jimmy's phone: </div>
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<b>"Eisley just put Luca to sleep. I don't even know what planet I am on."</b></div>
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But then. It happened again. And again. And again. She sings him some made up song - "go to sleep, sweet little bunny" repeatedly. And then I have to gather the pieces of my heart that lie all over the floor because I can hardly handle the sweetness.<b> </b></div>
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Since Luca can't seem to find the time to nap by himself, he is perfecting tricks and words. Oh, that boy. He's ornery and perfectly charming so that I don't eat him. He has learned to point and he loves to point at everything, but my favorite is when he sticks his tiny little finger up to my lips when we are snuggled together. He smiles as I kiss it, every time. His favorite two activities at the moment are shredding magazines and banging on the fireplace glass (winter will be fun) - and as he crawls to the fire place, he makes eye contact. Sort of like a challenge. Then he flashes that smile, maybe a twinkle in his eye and BANGBANGBANG! I try to redirect, but sometimes NO! comes out. And sometimes there is snapping so that he will be distracted. Today, he snapped back at me, and while he wasn't successful at making the snapping noise, my 10 month old totally just sassed me. He is talking now, and very into mimicking his sisters. His list of words includes: hi, dog, thank you, yeah (notably NOT making the list: mama). He loves to play peekaboo and he gives good kisses. </div>
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<br>
In other news: we retested Eisley for allergies. The fruit culprits that have made her sick in the past are indeed not allergies, so we can attempt to try them again. She is still very allergic to chicken and as I suspected, she is also allergic to turkey.<br>
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(taking dinner recommendations)<br>
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Life seems so thankless sometimes, recklessly throwing me from one scheduled thing to the next. I thought for sure I would reach this point in my life and have everything under control, know exactly what I was doing and be a proper adult, adulting with the best of them. But I don't know what I'm doing, and no one else does, and no one did when I was younger and thought they did. And that's okay, because I have this little family where we are happy and healthy and loving, I have these friends that seek me out to lift me up and love me, I have a never-ending list of things to be thankful for in this life. This crazy, beautiful life I couldn't have scripted better myself. <br>
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Busy, but so thankful.Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-79493787626279684422015-08-26T09:42:00.002-06:002015-08-26T09:52:33.213-06:00taking notes<br />
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Things I have learned since school begun:<br />
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Ridiculous o'clock is a horrible time to assess the mopping job beneath the table because the sunshine doesn't lie.<br />
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It's pretty easy - too easy - to shop at places when I'm down one kid. There's something about Ruby that makes Eisley very...touchy and giggly so a trip to Hobby Lobby turns into this thing where they dance and I cringe while I imagine all of the fragile, innocent things they twirl by, and they dance some more and then through gritted teeth for the 700th time, I say HANDS BEHIND YOUR BACK; DON'T EVEN LOOK AT EACH OTHER!<br />
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<i>So, where was I going with this?</i> Hobby Lobby. Target. Been there a few times with two kids and it feels like a vacation.<br />
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The pick up situation is a little sticky. So sticky, in fact, that in order to be perfectly prepared and on time, I have routed myself to the nearest Starbucks for the proper fuel. Constantly.<br />
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The first day of school, I was so excited to pick her up and hear about everything they had done. She hopped into the car with a wide, but tired smile, and the very first thing she said to me was, "Mom, can I finish my lunch?" In that moment, I slipped on a pair of sunglasses and let the pent up tears spill. <br />
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--<br />
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Onto other life things.<br />
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Last weekend, we made homemade noodles, used basil from our garden to make amazing pesto, and then we heard angels sing and I said every weekend should be a noodle weekend - we were all in the kitchen and it was just a fun family memory.<br />
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This garden thing? I'm a total rookie, but have enjoyed the results, and think maybe I'll need to add a few more things to my lineup for next year. And somehow convince my husband we need to move and get chickens, because why not? <br />
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<i>these aren't my own produce but the outcome was amazing. (recipe <a href="http://sallysbakingaddiction.com/2013/08/14/rustic-strawberry-peach-tart/" target="_blank">here</a>)</i></div>
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First birthday and Disney planning are underway, that thing where I imagine I have loads of free time and the ability to sew outfits right up has happened again which means: fabric collecting, and my schedule has officially transitioned from swimming dates to football and school functions. Pumpkin spice is around the corner - I may have already lit some festive candles.<br />
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Luca took a step on Monday - he is about to figure out this walking thing. I thought my life was crazy before as he tears apart cabinet contents, grabs cords, and man handles books like a professional- I think we're in for it.<br />
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My sister moves closer to us next week - excited is an understatement. Skillet cookies, movies, and DIY until you collapse in a fit of laughter: here we come!Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-49983578935432587092015-08-23T17:37:00.004-06:002015-08-23T17:37:55.052-06:00dear luca<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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my luca love,<br />
<br />
You aren't so little anymore; very
toddler-ish and very busy. You aren't quite walking, but you are
getting close - you can push your toy across the room and you can stand
unassisted for lengthy amounts of time. You weigh 20.2 pounds (26th percentile) and you are 28 inches tall (17th percentile).<br />
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Your tooth tally is up to four, almost five. The third one on the top is about to break through. Your second top front tooth came through with a bit of drama - a blister, which should be unsurprising since you have been throwing us for loops since day one. Thankfully, that has resolved and your tiny teeth look great! The biting, however, has been a battle. I'm hoping when your teeth stop hurting that you will stop because I think we all may have scars at the end of this.<br />
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We had a good run with the makeshift living room barricades. You just climb right over them, so we now rearrange furniture each morning in order to keep you contained. You have had a good amount of fits over your frustration at this - also a new development. You also have started voicing your displeasure at being unable to explore in various public places (mostly gymnastics and ballet; both floors crawling with things I can only imagine).<br />
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You are still really attached to me; I still make mad dashes with my head ducked behind things to avoid being caught (and subsequently yelled at). You mostly spend your days attached to me and I love that - I sneak away to make meals and do laundry, and much to your horror, to take showers.<br />
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You have really started "talking" this month - a lot of conversational sounding babbles. You definitely say GO! And I'm fairly certain you have said - hi, hello, and yeah - but I can't get you to repeat them much. You have babbled many other syllables (ma and da both made the list, but they are without meaning so far). You can sign more - we're slowly working on some other basic ones.<br />
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And in typical little boy fashion (I'm only assuming), you find it hilarious for me to tell you that you stink. "Gross!" sends you into hysterical fits of giggles.<br />
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Your sleep has been better (knock on ALL THE WOOD), and you seem to have accepted riding in the car (which we do a lot of). You take two really great naps each day, and you go to bed between 8 and 9. I usually take these breaks to tip-toe run through the house accomplishing various things that are impossible while you are awake. You always wake up with a sleepy, sweet smile - ready to snuggle for a minute, and then you're off to explore where you left off before your nap.<br />
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Life sure is crazy with you here, but we couldn't imagine it any different with our sweet, smiley, little entertainer. We are all so crazy about you!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">You recently tried spaghetti and loved it. I loved the fistfuls of noodles and your slurping noise with your proud smile. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">I love you to the moon!!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">XOXO,</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: small;">Mama </span></span></div>
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<i>getting this picture was a huge circus/wrestling match/joke - whatever you would like to say. Hence your displeased expression and the toy car I bribed you with.</i><br />
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Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5699790882708056366.post-78485347764859624262015-08-12T17:57:00.002-06:002015-08-12T19:08:40.976-06:00as you start school<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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To my precious Ruby,<br />
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I have a few more days of denial; you start first grade this week which hardly seems possible. This seems like <i>real school </i>in a way that kindergarten did not, and suddenly I'm wondering if I have properly prepared you to be a shining light.<br />
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In recent years, motherhood has delivered forgotten memories to the front porch of my mind - things of all sorts, but something in particular has taken up residence and I feel my chance to address it lies with paying my knowledge and heartache forward to save you from feeling this way.<br />
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I went to elementary school and junior high with a particular boy that still yanks on my heartstrings. He had yellow blonde hair and a starring-role face of a Norman Rockwell illustration. I can imagine the way his whole face smiled and I can see the serious look of concentration when he was called on in class; his cheeks glowed pink, his lips pursed shut. I can see the clothes he wore and the way his hair was sweetly parted to one side. Worst of all, I can see the way my peers treated him, and the way I never stood up for him. Without being outwardly mean, I was just as bad as those who were as I chose to never make it better.<br />
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I wish I had made him feel loved, noticed even. I wish I had taken the time to say hello to him and to get to know him. I wish I would have told him how nice he looked on those days that he looked so proud of his ragged button down shirt. I wish I would have told him how impressively quick he was when he ran, especially in his cowboy boots! I wish I had chosen bravery and kindness in favor of what my friends might have thought about me befriending him.<br />
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I think motherhood has this funny way of seeing life through a wide array of different lenses. While some lenses offer child-like innocence and magic, this one lives up to a sad truth. One that hurts my mama heart and one that I hope you never experience. This is one of the worst nightmares in the big book of motherhood, and something I know his mother would have given anything to change.<br />
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---<br />
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Know this, sweet one:<br />
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As the school bell rings, you walk into that school with your head held high and your heart open wide. You are the same person there as you are at home. You are loved, you are gracious, you are kind, and you are special. And so is every single one of your peers. You will never regret being nice, and you never know how much you may brighten someone's day.<br />
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May you always find butterflies and roly-polies magical.<br />
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May you spot the rainbows in life just as you love to do in the stream of hose water.<br />
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May you see the good in everyone.<br />
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May you always smile at the face in the mirror just as you do now.<br />
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May you always be a gracious winner and a pleasant loser.<br />
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May you always laugh.<br />
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May you celebrate the differences.<br />
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May you use your many gifts to make this world a brighter place, and may you never lose sight of the important things.<br />
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I love you to the moon!<br />
Now run into this world and work your magic!<br />
<br />
Love,<br />
Mom<br />
<br />
<i><span style="font-size: x-small;">{I recently tried to find this guy with not a whole lot of luck. I did contact a family member in hopes of connecting so that I could formally apologize all these years later and to tell him that he is loved and worthy. I plan to keep trying to reach him!}</span></i>Hillaryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17449503652331302016noreply@blogger.com0