It has been weeks since Luca has slept well. My mind feels like mud and my patience is low - not a great way to start out the summer, and most especially the summer where I feel like I'm making up for last year's lost summer (also known as: the summer I spent in bed thanks to pregnancy).
Yesterday, after another horrible night, I wrote down the nitty gritty details of Luca's day. I still am not sure, but I hope I have pinned it to tummy troubles which aren't uncommon for him. And the timeline of recent sleeping...er, not - coincides with the introduction of solid foods. Every nap was fought, and seemed less than worth it at a whopping forty minutes each. My nerves were frazzled and I felt like a failure. My baby was unhappy and I didn't know why, my other kids received unfair portions of a short temper that stemmed from frustration and exhaustion. Bed time came and went that left me with a messy house, a mystery rash, a mosquito bite that would swell my eye shut, and a lot of regrets. I may have entertained the idea of a solo hotel stay.
Last night, he had probiotics right before bed, slept until 5 this morning, ate and went back to sleep. Can you hear the angels singing? My mind was made of HALLELUJAHs at just 11:30 last night when he had been sleeping for two hours in which I did my best imitation of a statue, not daring to move.
I spent quiet time with coffee, uninterrupted breakfast, my bible, and some mom inspiration this morning while my kids all played together and my baby wasn't screaming for me. I feel renewed, grateful for little victories, and inspired to allow mom guilt to be a thing of yesterday.
little moments that bring joy.
My house is clean, I'm armed with encouragement (and coffee, of course), my kids are happy and loved. Today is a new day, and one that offers forgiveness and grace. I will love my family, savor the moments and know that I'm not required to make up for lost time. The world has a whole lot to offer, but inside of our little home is my favorite, safe and uncomplicated haven.
Things that have inspired me recently:
Women in the Word - I can't wait to start each morning with SRT - I have studied with them for a few years now, and enjoy the bravery, inspiration, and truth about Jesus.
Slow Parenting - I read this last weekend and caught myself saying, "Come on, hurry!" within the hour. Savor the moments, they are all special.
Start anew, today. - I could spend hours reading her blog entries. Meaningful, honest, and great foundations for a wholesome, family-centered life.