Thursday, March 31, 2011

a weight lifted

Today was fairly productive when I was away from the house, but since I have returned, I have been glued to a four week old (!!!) baby trying, and failing miserably, at multitasking.  I tried preparing some ingredients for various upcoming meals, tried making cookies, tried picking up the kitchen, and tried putting groceries away.  Most of them are now half accomplished and I'm stuck with the snuggle magnet on the couch while Ruby has turned loose a zillion Zhu Zhu pets in our living room.

I managed to get a few things done thanks to the mei tai, but there is only so much laundry moving and cookie collecting I can do in that thing - it reminds me of aching joints and impossible house chores at the end of pregnancy.  

Eisley and I left the house this morning to get some errands done and despite a particularly humiliating moment in Target having nothing to do with Eisley, the day went smooth.  I had a doctor appointment to check on something that has been a serious source of anxiety for me over the last two weeks.  Shortly after we came home with Eisley, I noticed a disturbing lump.  I chalked it up to breastfeeding but later became disturbed.  The size of it was extremely concerning to me, and it was a wait and see game as far as an official diagnosis was concerned.  The timing was terrible.  I called to make an appointment on a Monday - my appointment was made for a Thursday.  My doctor called out sick that day and my appointment was moved to the following Monday.  She didn't have answers for me when I saw her that day, and we left the following day for Illinois with a second appointment scheduled for today.  That seems like an eternity when something like that refuses to leave your mind.

Anyway.  It is shrinking noticeably which means it is positively not cancer or anything else posing such a scare.  I feel like I can breathe again.

Things feel slightly less than normal around here.  I keep thinking of things that remind me of Larry.  It's so unreal to know that I'll never ask Jimmy who is on the phone again, knowing that he'll tell me it's his dad.  He won't ever call here again and ask, "What's James doing?" in a chipper, too-loud-for-the-phone voice.

Last week was a terrible week.  So far, this one seems to be much better with the only excitement being some wicked projectile vomiting skills by my peanut, a new iPad, and Daddy and Ruby making extremely funny pictures using Photo Booth on aforementioned iPad.  Oh, and a serious monogrammed girly things shopping spree on etsy.  Oops?  But best of all, on top of the news I got at the doctor, was finding out one of my favorite people is pregnant.


Lately, when I ask Ruby to pick up her toys or get dressed, she replies, "I'm too tired."

The other day, Ruby started talking about a Biiiig Wolf.  Upon further questioning, I learned that she knows the story of the Three Little Pigs.  She tells parts of the story and then throws in her own additions like, "The big wolf went across the river in his boat.  Paddle, paddle."

Should you find yourself hearing Ruby asking for Blue Hammy, know that she is asking for salami.

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