Monday, November 9, 2009

Birthday Eve

Here we are, the last day in the first year of Ruby's life. Once again, I sit here and think about where I was 365 days ago. Too fat to move off of the couch without a hand from Jimmy, too depressed to do anything but eat some more and complain that I probably would be pregnant forever (because this happens often). I complained to Jimmy going to bed on the Sunday night that I was just ready to be done. Little did I know I would be meeting that mystery person that had taken up comfy residence in my belly in just a few short hours.

You can read the birth story here if you wish to relive this experience as I do so often.

I really can't belive it. I can't get over time's ability to fly right past my eyes, dragging me along with it whether I'm ready and willing or not. Prior to having Ruby, I made fun of those people. The ones that constantly remark about time flying and how fast kids grow up. I found it rather annoying, quite honestly. Now, I have clearly gone to the dark side and become one of those annoying people. It's all been put into perspective for me, and I sit here, being dragged through time by some powerful force and all I can do is sit here in shock, recounting all of the memories.

At the end of my pregnancy with Ruby, I panicked a little about bringing a life into this world and knowing that my own life would never be the same. Never again would it be just the two of us, and we were suddenly responsible for this life; there was no returning the baby to the parents at the end of a night of babysitting. All of the baby gear was ours. There was certainly no turning back, but there were some moments that I definitely wondered What have we done?!

One year later, I have responsibility of a life that has forever changed mine in a way I never could have anticipated. It's an unreal feeling to know that you have only known someone for such a short amount of time and that they are and always will be the center of your entire world. True love.

One year later, there is no mystery of that little person wiggling inside of me. Instead there is pink stuff everywhere and we prepare to celebrate her very existence and wonder just what more of her little personality is yet to be revealed.

What a blessed life-this year has been an amazing ride.

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